Sunday

Earlier this year, I stopped going to church after about five months of going every Sunday. I converted to Christianity last year, but by the time this year rolled around, I came to the conclusion that it just wasn`t right for me. I don`t regret the decision to leave.

But what I didn't count on was just how much I miss the people at that church. Especially the "coffee ladies". Mary was especially wonderful, one of the first people to greet me as I walked in the door, always insisting that I sit with her during the service. Grant, one of the ministers, was always entertaining to listen to. It was just a friendly, welcoming church. I especially enjoyed the fact that it was an inclusive, affirming congregation - I marched in the gay pride parade with them. Even if, towards the end, I dreaded things like reading the Bible or going onto Christian message boards, I always loved that church.

Which is why, every Sunday, I wake up with this sense of loneliness, this feeling that I should be there, not lounging around in bed. It`s not a spiritual loneliness - I`ve taken the Kemetic Orthodox Shemsu vows again, and I couldn`t be happier - but...that face-to-face interaction just isn`t there. I`m the only KO I know of in this city, maybe even the province, and that can lead to some lonely times.

I guess there isn`t much to be done about that.